Welcome to How to Love Your body - on today’s episode we are going to be doing a quick coaching episode on setting boundaries with family when it comes to diet culture and body comments.
We get that it may be challenging for you over the holidays as you may be seeing family more than usual- and if you have someone or multiple people in your family who are deep in diet culture / like to comment on your body / other peoples bodies this would be tough as an UnDieter - triggers everywhere!
So what can you do ?
1. Prepare ahead of time
If there is someone specific you are thinking of - let’s say your mom - you may have done this a million times - let them know before hand that you don’t want any diet talk or comments from them. Tell them they can have their own opinion and own life for themselves but when you are around to not talk about it directly to you. Of course she (or whoever you are thinking of) can not honor your request but the point is- you are setting a boundary with them and if they break those boundaries that is some solid information to you - you will know that they do not respect your wishes and maybe you can assess how you want them to be in your lives if they can’t respect your boundaries?
2. Leave the room
If there is any diet talk around you - family is talking about the food or weight gain or about other people's weight - about dieting and working out etc- You are more than allowed to simply get up and leave the room. You do not need to be exposed to that. It also is non combative- you don’t like what you hear and you have the free will to get up and leave. That’s a boundary.
3. Be direct with your words
If someone says something directly to you about your body, about your food choices, about anything that doesn’t feel appropriate to you - you can simply say - “This is not something I’m willing to discuss” or “Please don’t comment on my body” or “Please keep your opinions about what I’m eating to yourself” etc - You can actually tell people (respectfully) what you are okay with and what you are not okay with. Yes, it may be a challenge, it may be uncomfortable but this is self care. This is your right to show people what you are okay / not okay with. They have the same ability to set boundaries as well. So be respectful and direct.
4. Create a protective shield - meditation/ visual
What do you feel will protect your energy most?
There are many other ways you can create boundaries during the holidays - if any of these feel useful to you - take it on! Enjoy what you can during the holidays and know they won’t last forever… AND even though you may be immersed in diet culture with family parties hold on to the thought that you are standing for yourself - you have decided to leave diet culture and find freedom and wellness without the obsession. That being an UnDieter is what will find you joy and heal your relationship with food and your body.
You are courageous and amazing for all that you are doing as an Intuitive Eater! And know you are not alone as there are so many other women out there doing this work with you and navigating their way through all the challenges as well. Keep going, we got your back!
Happy Holidays and see you next week!