This week’s episode is brought to you by our free masterclass we are hosting, TODAY Tuesday November 12th at 5:30 pm pacific and Thursday November 14th at 5:30 pm pacific - its called:

“The 3 Ingredients you need to become an intuitive eater and find wellness without the obsession (even if you still want to lose weight)” you can grab your free spot at for which ever time is most convenient. 


We will be sharing:


The 3 ingredients who must combine in order to find the balance in this work. 

We will be going over what they are and how to begin implementing them into your life.

At the end of the masterclass we will also be sharing more details about The UnDiet Academy (PLUS some bonuses for those who come on live).


Now back to today’s episode:

You’ve probably heard many people in the diet industry start talking about “the healthy holidays” and “how not to splurge during the holidays” and “Holiday workout challenge” and all the things that make you fear the holidays and all the food etc.

So we are your friendly UnDiet coaches who are here to ease your mind and share with you why there is no need to panic! 

YES you can be an Intuitive Eater/ UnDieter through the Holidays without feeling guilty and shamed for not jumping on the Healthy Holiday Diet Challenge Bandwagon. 

There is no need for that and if anything it will be more harmful to you than helpful - so spare yourself the fear mongering diet culture and jump on board with us.

Where you can live your life, enjoy the holidays, and feel really good about it!!! 

Here’s 5 helpful suggestions we’d like to share with you: 

1. The more you allow - the less bingeing (or not at all!)  

The second you go into a holiday party already trying to control what you should eat and what to eat and what not to eat you are setting yourself for an all out free for all / maybe even binge. The more you can breathe and keep telling yourself you can literally eat WHATEVER you want at whatever party you go to - the intuition sticks by your side.

Since you know you can have it all, it doesn’t seem so scarce. There is an abundant mindset and you know that if you want to eat more later or tomorrow you can have it, so you don’t need to eat all that pie you never get to eat all year today because you can take some leftovers home. AND if you are saying, but seriously I never get this pie/ dessert any time of the year i can’t control myself around it - get the dang recipe and make it available to you during the year so it doesn’t seem so special. 

Most things you can recreate and yeah maybe it’s a nostalgic thing that you mom makes or grandma makes etc. But would it be sooooo bad if ya just ate more of what you wanted because it just tastes so good and that’s the choice you make? It’s okay to choose to eat more than feels good because it tastes good. That’s a part of normal eating! SO ALLOW! 


2. You are worth it Guide 

Use this guideline to help tune in to what you ACTUALLY want and what ACTUALLY tastes good. At holiday parties there could be like 20 things to put on your plate and your eyes may be thinking I WANT TO TRY IT ALL! And maybe you do and that’s great. Whatever looks good to you and what will feel good - put some on your plate. Remember you can ALWAYS go back for more. When you start to eat the things - notice what tastes amazing to you and what doesn’t taste as amazing.

You don’t have to finish something on your plate that actually doesn’t taste as great as you thought - stick to the foods that seem really worth it to you. The ones that melt in your mouth, that makes you say WOW.

This will help you stick to the foods that you really enjoy and pass on the food that you can go without. You don’t have to eat every single thing just because it’s there. Remember, you are worth it to eat the best of the best if it’s available :) Do the same with the dessert table! 


AND this is not a rule - want to eat all the things regardless of how good it is, that's up to you!

3. Perspective: It’s not as much as you think

It’s about 35 days from Nov-Jan with Holidays - there are 5 scheduled holidays - Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, NYE and New Years Day- so let’s just add on another 5 Holiday parties - to make it 10 “out of the norm” scheduled parties that have food and drinks. -

If 10 out of the 35 days you are tuning in, listening to your body, allowing all food, checking in on what feels good, maybe you even feel full or say you’ve overeaten - is it really that bad to have 10 days of this that doesn’t feel crazy or obsessive it just feels like you get to enjoy extra delicious food because of the special occasions. How lovely to have these days to enjoy yourself and trust your body that it will ebb and flow and soon enough the holidays will end and maybe there won’t be as many parties but you still do the same thing that you were doing the entire time - listening and allowing , doing what feels good and yes there will be times when you feel full because of that decadent dessert or extra helping of dinner you enjoyed so much…

we say that feels sustainable and calm and peaceful - it doesn’t need to be restrictive and full of bingeing for 35 days because “it’s the holiday season” - You just take it one day at a time and you trust yourself and your body knowing that it’ll do it’s thing.




4. Wear Comfy clothes

For the holiday season (and always) but for the sake of talking about the Holiday season we know you may be putting outfits together or buying new ones for these occasions- One of the best ways to not trigger yourself at a party with all the food and the people is to wear something you feel good in and that you like. It can be stylish, it can even be sexy if that’s what you like - we aren’t saying to wear sweatpants :)

Just be conscious of how your clothes are fitting and how you feel in them. If you show up to a party already feeling like your pants are too tight or that dress is uncomfortable or the way your arms feel in that shirt- that’s a big set up for catastrophic thinking around your body and could spiral you- so wear something that you enjoy, feels good, you like the look of, makes you feel confident - do your hair / makeup if that’s your jam and if not, no need.

Just do YOU!

5. Setting Boundaries


This may not be directly about food - but this is an important part of the holidays - setting those boundaries. We get that not everyone has “the most wonderful time of the year” during the holidays. We know it can be stressful to see certain family members that you don’t normally see or even just having everyone together can be a triggering event.

Of course there’s the good parts too - and to help you get through the holidays without feeling so completely depleted setting boundaries will be super helpful. Especially when you hear the constant diet talk or your mom, grandma, or aunt (or whoever) comments on your weight and/or everyone else’s weight.

Things you can do…..

+Leave the room

+Actively say out loud that this is not a topic you’ll be discussing
+Go run an errand by yourself to get away for some alone time just to breathe
+Leave the party early if that’s what will honor your the most
+Remember that you don’t need to explain yourself to anyone about what you look like or what you choose to eat- it does not even have to be part of the discussion.

+Have a “life line” - a friend/ someone you trust that you can call to feel supported by.



  1. ALLOW  - to eliminate bingeing 
  2. Utilize the You are Worth it Guide
  3.  Remember, there aren’t as many holidays as you think! It will end! 
  4. Wear comfy clothes 
  5. Set Boundaries 


Remember to grab your worksheet at so you can feel confident going into the Holidays as an UnDieter! 

Don’t forget to grab a spot in our free masterclass  “The 3 Ingredients you need to become an intuitive eater and find wellness without the obsession (even if you still want to lose weight) - How to stop dieting, end binge eating and live a naturally balanced life with ease.”

This masterclass will be held TODAY, November 12th & Thursday, November 14th both will be at 530pm pacific - so you can choose which time is convenient for you! - 

Sign up and save your spot at You don’t want to miss this!!  

See you next week! 

This week on How to Love Your Body we are talking about weight loss and the expectations we have from it.


Before we begin we are THRILLED to share with you a free masterclass we are hosting Tuesday November 12th at 5:30 pm pacific and Thursday November 14th at 5:30 pm pacific called “ The 3 Ingredients you need to become an intuitive eater and find wellness without the obsession (even if you still want to lose weight),” you can grab your free spot at for which ever time is most convenient. 


We will be sharing:



  • The 3 ingredients you must combine in order to find the balance in this work. 
  • We will be going over what they are and how to begin implementing them into your life.
  • At the end of the masterclass we will also be sharing more details about The UnDiet Academy at the end of the class (PLUS some bonuses for those who come on live).


You can grab your spot at

Now let’s dive into today’s episode:

The reason we have these high expectations of weight loss is that the world is CONSTANTLY telling us that if we lose weight life will be better, we will be more loved, we will belong, we will be healthier, have more energy, live longer and be content….. So yeah, we want a lot to happen when we lose weight, how could we not?


This past week in our public Facebook group called Intuitive Eating and Body Love support, we posted a question and asked “Do you have a few sentences you can share about losing weight and it wasn't all you thought it would be?”, so we could get some insights for this episode.


We expected to get a couple responses but we didn’t, we received, 86 women’s stories about their experience after losing weight and it really solidified the truth that we are expecting too much from weight loss.


The reason this is a problem is BECAUSE we are expecting it to be life changing, we are sacrificing WAY too much to try to make it happen.



  • Physical and mental health
  • Social lives
  • Getting stuck in the cycle
  • Causes ourselves so much anguish and pain when we are constantly falling off the wagon.



We’d like to share a few people’s stories with you before we get any further into today’s topic…


  • No matter how much I lost, no matter how much smaller I was NEVER enough.


(And 4 people responded “me too”.)



  • I thought things would be ok, that I would feel great and satisfied when I got to my goal weight. When I got there, at that weight I wondered what it would feel like to lose 5 more. Would that bring me the joy and satisfaction? I realized there was just no end point.




  • The joy of weight loss was like a high that I quickly came down from. Then I wanted MORE. There was always something to fix and I ended up feeling horrible in the end.




  • Losing weight was never over. It always had to be more so no part of me enjoyed it. As it continued I became more isolated, depressed and obsessed.




  • I lost weight and life was the exact same. Literally nothing changed besides the number on the scale. I still had all the same problems and struggles.



And there are over 80 more comments with almost this exact same sentiment.


We work so hard towards something where the finish line is always moving AND if we do get there it doesn’t feel much different than when we started.


So why do we kill ourselves to lose weight? Many of us have spent 10-30 or 40 years in the diet cycle, often just losing and gaining the same pounds…


If you’ve been on the hunt for weight loss most of your life, we’d like you to ask yourself some of these questions.


And to get the questions and actually work them out, you can get your worksheet at


What will be different PHYSICALLY if you lost the weight you want to lose?

Here’s an example: I had this thought once when I was sitting at home having a bad body image moment. I asked myself, what would ACTUALLY be different right now if I was thinner….. My baby would still be crying, my husband would still be looking at his phone and my house would still be a mess… my LIFE would truly be exactly the same.


You might be thinking - but I have physical pain or a physical illness or ailment that really would be better with weight loss… you can write down what you think would be different and we’ll talk more about that in a minute. 


BUT WE DO WANT TO SHARE SOMETHING WITH YOU - this was posted by my friend Andrea Hardy who is an anti diet dietitian “ Research shows that positive health behavior, can reduce mortality risk to the point where there is NO difference between those in smaller or larger bodies. 


Meaning - you can take a lot of action to improve pain, illness etc without it being about weight.


 But let’s move forward. 

What will be different emotionally?

How will you feel about yourself and about your body?

Now if you’re just listening and not writing it down take a second to think of a few things for each. 


What would be different physically and what would be different emotionally….

Now ask yourself, is this true?


Can you absolutely know this is true?


You might have thoughts of things like, xyz medical issue will be resolved (how do you know?), I will be confident (that’s what the 85 + women thought too that commented on our post), it’s amazing how we expect so much from weight loss but in reality we don’t end up where we thought we would.


We really do add a lot of romanticism and fantasy to weight loss - we imagine all that it could be and THIS is the fuel that keeps us stuck in the hopeless diet cycle for so many years, wasting our time, energy and money on this mad hunt for weight loss that is not what it seems.


A great example of this is in a podcast we both listened to the other week called The Happiness Lab - it is about the science of happiness and how we can all be happier.


One episode is about lottery winners. Of course we all believe that if we won the lottery there would be a laundry list of amazing things that would happen, but in fact the majority of lottery winners say its the worst thing that ever happened to them - many people end up divorced, in bankruptcy, or worse.


We truly are horrible at foreshadowing what will make us happy - and it’s often not the obvious things that our society makes us think of like - losing weight, winning the lottery, getting that promotion or finally getting married.


These are not things we can bank on to change our lives or make us happier. 


“But Jenna and Lauren, I feel so crappy in my body and I am not healthy” - okay what does that have to do with pursuing weight loss?


What are some actions you can take THIS WEEK to feel better?


Are you an intuitive eater with a healthy relationship with food and exercise? 


Working on this will get you much further health wise (both mentally and physically) and happiness wise too.


In fact in The UnDiet Academy we have a whole module on how to increase happiness long term so the hunt for weight loss isn’t the only thing getting you excited about life.


Now grab your worksheet so you can really reflect on the questions we talked about today and let’s start realizing what weight loss is - simply a change in dress size, it will do nothing else for you other than that, ESPECIALLY when it takes over your life in order to get there (and you only stay there short term). 


And of course - 


Don’t forget to join our free masterclass we are hosting, Tuesday November 12th at 5:30 pm pacific called and Thursday November 14th at 5:30 pm pacific -  “The 3 Ingredients you need to become an intuitive eater and find wellness without the obsession (even if you still want to lose weight) , you can grab your free spot at for whichever time is most convenient. 


We will be sharing:



  • The 3 ingredients who must combine in order to find the balance in this work. 
  • We will be going over what they are and how to begin implementing them into your life.
  • At the end of the masterclass we will also be sharing more details about The UnDiet Academy at the end of the class (PLUS some bonuses for those who come on live)


We will see you there!

Until next week, bye!

This week on how to love your body we are talking about the two key ingredients that make UnDieting work and help you find balance with food.

But before we dive into that we are here to announce a really exciting giveaway.

We will be giving away a spot in the UnDiet academy this fall to one lucky winner.

To enter all you have to do is rate and review the podcast on itunes, unfortunately only those in Canada and the US are eligible solely because we cannot see reviews from other countries.

To do this just scroll to the bottom of the page when listening to our podcast on itunes, click the 5 stars to give a rating and then click where it says write a review and leave a couple sentences about the podcast.

Once you’ve done that you are officially entered! We will be choosing the winner on Friday November 1st so be sure to do the rate and review before then.

Thank you so much for helping the podcast AND entering to win the spot in the Academy!

So lets dive into today's episode - dont forget to grab this week’s worksheet at

People have different views on what intuitive eating and UnDieting is,  because there are 2 aspects that are vital to make it work but some people only see one side or the other and don’t combine them to create the balance and flow that undieting really is all about!

Ingredient 1: 

Some people think being an UnDieter means just allow all food.

Eat what you want, when you want it.



These people aren’t wrong. This is such an important part of this work - stopping the restrictions and realizing that food is truly abundant. 

But that’s not all it is!

With just this one ingredient you end up feeling pretty crappy, like now you’ve just stopped dieting, you gave up, who cares, just eat it all!

That isn't wellness without the obsession, that's not freedom and it isn't something you’re going to want to live in for the rest of your life - and we are all about sustainability. 

You’re either dieting or not dieting. 


Ingredient 2: Some people think being an UnDieter is just about listening to your body

AKA Eat when you’re hungry and stop when you’re full.

These people think that your body now rules you, you MUST eat when you are hungry and you must stop when you are full (but not too full god forbid).

This is the side that falls back into it just being another diet, just different new rules they need to follow.

Those who believe that listening to your body is everything end up:

  • Stressing about doing intuitive eating “right”
  • Worry when they don't know exactly what they want to eat
  • Think things like, well I don't really NEED that cookie
  • Feel guilty for getting too full

This isn’t freedom either - it sounds just as stressful as dieting in my opinion.

It might be honoring your body but without the mindset shifts of allowing and abundance, it is much too rigid and not what most of you are going for.

So what happens when we combine these two ingredients :

Here are some things that can happen when you combine the MINDSET of abundance and allowing food with the ACTION of listening to your body  :

MINDSET: I can eat this food whenever I want, I literally can have this pie for breakfast if I want or come get some in the middle of the night 

ACTION: so it’s no loss to stop eating now that I’m full, I can just eat more later.

RESULT: You now can enjoy the pie and stop when you feel done without feeling restricted or like you SHOULD stop.

MINDSET: I can eat any cookies I want …. Hmm this one looks pretty good

ACTION: you take a bite and realize it doesn’t taste that great so you throw the rest out..

RESULT: You don’t feel like you SHOULDNT eat the cookie, you just genuinely think you can do better and your body isn’t loving it but you COULD eat it if you want. 

(Be honest when you were dieting you definitely ate some gross things because it was the only dessert around and you had to start your diet again tomorrow so this was your last chance!)

MINDSET: I’m allowed to order whatever I want when I go out to restaurants

ACTION: you tune into your body and realize you’re not all that hungry, that pecan salad sounds great….

RESULT: Eating a salad because you want to, not because you have to…. WHAT?!


MINDSET: You can eat anything you want at anytime and your friend just baked some cookies that are just coming out of the overn

ACTION: you tune in and realize you’re too full from dinner so you pass on the cookies for now.

RESULT: You bring some of those bad boys home because you can have them whenever you want

SECONDARY RESULT: Since you can have them whenever, they are just food now… honestly not as amazing as they used to be. They still taste great but its just a cookie, you cna have them anytime…. So you eat a few of them over the next couple days and by the time you get to the last few they’re kinda stale so you don’t end up eating them all.


THIS EQUATION is how you find wellness wihtout the obsession.

You must BOTH have the mindset work locked in AND learn how to take action and listen to your body.

Only having one or the other is how you get stuck in just feeling like you're not dieting and it feels crappy, or intuitive eating turns into a diet with rules and shoulds.

To find wellness without the obsession you need BOTH of these ingredients.

Be sure to grab your checklist to see which of the 2 ingredients you will want to work on to find more balance! You can find the worksheet at

You can find these ingredients and all the others it takes to make UnDieting a way of life for you, in The UnDiet Academy which reopens on November 12th.

Be sure to join the waitlist at to get more info and receive the early bird discount code.

And rate and review the podcast if you want to win your spot in the UnDiet Academy!

This week on How to Love Your Body we will be discussing the #1 fear and concern on this journey - fear of weight gain and wanting to lose weight.

Don’t forget to grab your worksheet - you can get it at


We have done some polling lately on the one thing holding you back from fulling embarking on your UnDieting journey and 100% of people said they are afraid of gaining weight or they still want to lose weight

AND we get it…

In this work we’re supposed to “not care at all” about weight anymore, but it just isn’t that simple, we still live in a world that cares about weight and after focusing on weight loss for so many years it can feel scary to stop FOCUSING ON IT.

And here’s what we’re really talking about when we talk about weight in Intuitive Eating and UnDieting, it’s about redirecting your FOCUS away from the way your body looks and towards the way your body feels.

In this episode we will go over WHY we don’t focus on weight loss, the effects of focusing on weight loss, and what you can do instead to find a sustainable life of wellness without the obsession.



The reason we encourage people to let go of the focus on weight is because you technically cannot be PURSUING weight loss and be intuitive and those who follow our work are aiming to become intuitive eaters.

The reason this is, is because when you PURSUE weight loss you will second guess your body’s signals, do I REALLY need that cookie? And soon enough you are restricting and the cycle starts all over again.

But here’s the thing - letting go of the focus on weight loss doesn’t dictate what will happen with your body - it doesn’t mean weight loss will never happen and it doesnt mean it will happen. When you listen to your body there are 3 options, you may lose weight, gain weight, or stay the same, but the one guarantee is that you will find wellness, can prioritize feeling good and can be active, nourished and living an enjoyable and sustainable lifestyle. 



Let’s look at the focus on weight loss a little more closely. 

When you were focused on weight loss for all those years, did it work? DId you lose weight and keep it off?

We did a poll on our instagram asking you about this and 85% of you said no.

So what about the other 15%? Dieting worked for them? Why?? That’s not fair…

It didn’t - we asked this group of people what it takes to maintain that weight loss and every answer included the words: obsession, exhausted etc…

So what results did focusing on weight loss give you?

That is something to reflect on, the good and the bad…. You can do this on this week’s worksheet at

Some things that the focus of weight loss may have given you -- food preoccupation, binge eating, body obsession….

So what can I do instead if I stop focusing/ pursuing weight loss?

Honor your body and take amazing care of it without it being about weight all the dang time!

Wellness without the obsession!

Focusing on feeling good in your body - that might mean moving your body, eating a wide variety of foods, listening to your body (this is also different from listening to your tastebuds, a topic for another episode) , saying yes to food when it sounds good, saying no to food when you dont feel like, really being your own boss when it comes to your wellness.

We realize this may mean you’re not in the smallest body you’ve ever been in, but it can lead you to a place of physical and mental stability, no more cycling, yo yoing weight or the constant starting over.

So what do you want?

To cycle through the weight focus mess again and again and again or to find freedom, find balanced and enjoyable wellness and have it last a lifetime?

It really is time to decide.

So to dive deeper into this be sure to grab your worksheet at and of course add yourself to The UnDiet Academy waitlist if you think you might be ready next month to really make this change in your life!

Doors open November 12th!

Love, Lauren and Jenna 

This week on How to Love Your Body we will be tackling the complete UnDiet process so you know what to expect the journey to look like.

There are 5 phases of the UnDiet process - the first you are likely well aware of and most of you are probably swimming around in it and the following 4 phases might sound familiar but their sequence and details are vital to getting to a place that is intuitive, free from restricting and dieting completely but still feels good - wellness without the obsession.

Next week we will be tackling the #1 fear on this journey - and that is weight gain or not losing weight… but for now we will be demonstrating the phases of the undiet process and these phases are HOW you can find balance in the end.

There is a worksheet that goes with this episode so you can track the 5 phases and take notes on where you are and what your next steps might be. You can grab this at


Phase 1: The Initial Exit 


It looks like this -

First you’re swirling around the diet cycle for years - restrict/binge, all or nothing thinking, on WW or meal plans, keto or “eating clean”...

And then there does come a day when you JUST CANNOT DO THIS ANYMORE!

Perhaps hearing about intuitive eating or the non diet approach gets you to officially quit or you stop because you just can’t do it anymore and then begin looking into things and discover intuitive eating and body positivity….

Okay great so you’re officially no longer on a diet, technically, and then comes…. The information overload..

You listen to 5 different intuitive eating/ body positive podcasts, you’ve read all the major books, you’re in 3 different IE facebook groups, you’re following a ton of body positive instagram accounts…

Okay here you are - you know some stuff, a lot of stuff….

But it’s just that… knowledge… and it hasn’t converted to food freedom, body love or embodying intuitive eating..

But this is the beginning and it's so vital.

You’ve exited the diets (technically) and now you know what makes sense and what you want for yourself… to be at peace with food, for eating to be easy, to stop binge eating, to feel good and have wellness without the obsession.

This leads us into Phase 2: The Diet Mentality Detox

You may have done cleanses in the past but this one is different (and the only one that will actually work).

The way we think in a diet is what makes exiting the cycle hard - it’s why we can’t just decide to stop dieting and magically be balanced and intuitive once we quit.

So what needs to happen here before we move forward?

Here are the changes that need to occur:


-  Diet talk needs to transform to UnDiet talk (language, thoughts and beliefs need to shift)

-  Getting rid of diet triggers - clearing your space

- focus shifts from how to look to how you feel

- releasing all or nothing thinking and the other most common dieting mindsets

This phase results in:

  • Stop thinking about food all day
  • Diet rules fade away
  • Clearer mind instead of the constant diet chatter

Phase 3: The Inner Self Work 

Once we begin thinking differently there is another layer that needs to be added -- deeper work involving:

  • Self worth
  • Self acceptance
  • Self love

A part of this is body acceptance and we of course love the term body love but it’s often misconstrued.

We don’t mean you now need to love your body and the way it looks all the time…

Honestly, the way your body looks is the least interesting thing about you.

WHO you are is what is interesting and it’s what we want to focus on.

Finding worth in ourselves APART from our bodies (because whether you lose weight, gain weight or stay the same on this journey, you’re going to want to be okay regardless. 

Self acceptance does not mean - face it lady, you’ll be this way forever, get over it.

What it does mean is -- Hi, you are you in this moment, and you’re in the only body you’ll ever have so instead of fighting against reality, let’s work with what we got! (This skill will allow you to embody intuitive eating when the phase comes!)

And self love - means learning how not to be so hard on yourself. Because woman, you’ve got it going on and you’re wasting the years away thinking differently. 

Once you’ve quit the diets, detoxed the diet mentality, created a deeper sense of self it is time to truly EMBODY intuitive eating….

You might be thinking… I have to do all that before I can eat intuitively? 


Well no - you can absolutely work on listening to your body signals etc before this point BUT if you go from the initial exit, to practicing the principles of intuitive eating, it is likely to stay on the surface, to remain something you have to think about all the time, something you can’t quite crack the code on and for many it just turns into another diet…

Phase 4: The Embodiment of IE


In phase 4 you use your new way of thinking and deeper sense of self to navigate you through BECOMING an intuitive eater. 


Listening to your body becomes natural and simple. Tap into your natural ability to know what your body needs. Imagine living life in a balanced and sustainable way without ANYONE ELSE telling you what you should eat ever again…

This is the dream people. 

This is when things like this begin to happen:


  • Forgetting you have ice cream in the freezer
  • Eating a cookie because you feel like it and putting the rest back for another day (no more finding yourself elbow deep in the cookie jar after everyones gone to bed)
  • Order the salad because that’s what you feel like (no more shoulds)
  • Binge eating ends


Okay -- well what’s phase 5?


I already know the elements of intuitive eating and I still feel pretty crappy physically. I’m allowing all food but its not feeling so good.


 This is where Phase 5 comes in: Wellness Without the Obsession


NO this is not a bait and switch and just getting diet-y again.

But it is ONLY at this point (when the other 4 phases are feeling pretty steady - note : its never going to be perfect) that we begin thinking about the more traditional elements of wellness…

At this point we begin to focus on things like:

(it will be different for everyone, YOU have to decide what wellness without the obsession looks like for you so not all of these things will relate to all UnDieters).


  • Wanting to get more veggies or variety into your life
  • Moving your body more/ at all depending where you’re at
  • Getting more sleep
  • Wanting to tune into your body more because you find you are overeating a lot


  • This is where the fine tuning occurs.

Where do these 5 phases lead you?


You’ll go from feeling confused about what to do now that you’ve ditched the diet (and like all you’re doing is eating all the food and living in fear of weight gain) to feeling balanced and at ease with food and in your body. You can now live in wellness without the obsession for the rest of your life.


Side effects of this process can include:


  • End binge eating
  • Body stabilization
  • Not thinking about food all damn day
  • The calculator in your head can stop
  • A naturally balanced, yet flexible life that WILL last forever - because it’s second nature. If something you have to work hard at, it’s impossible for it to last
  • Stop feeling addicted to food

On your worksheet take a look at where you think you might be in the phases - take a look at what your next steps might be, assess if you've missed steps along the way.

All of this will give you insight into why it might not be clicking yet. You can grab that at


And of course if you’re interested in the HOW for these 5 phases, these are the 5 phases of The UnDiet Academy that we can take you through so you can build YOUR life as an intuitive eater who gets to practice wellness without the obsession.

No more yo-yo, no more cycle, just a steady, yet flexible lifestyle that will follow you through all stages of life and serve you well no matter where life takes you.

You can get on the waitlist for more info and for a discount code at 

We will talk to you next week where we will be tackling the fear of weight gain/ not losing weight. 

See you then!

Welcome to How to Love Your Body, this is Jenna and Lauren, your UnDiet and Body Love Coaches.

Today we are going to be talking about why trying to heal the relationship with food and your body may be a lot harder when you’re going at it alone.

You can grab your worksheet here -

Of course you are an amazing and capable woman who CAN achieve being an UnDieter and finding freedom from food and there is no shame in getting support in what most find a challenging process. 

You may have been struggling with this from 10-30 years - no wonder you can’t just heal with the snap of your fingers … but we are here to tell you that this is absolutely possible and getting support in this area is one of the best things you can do to honor yourself. 

You may be in one of these 2 places….

You’ve been at this a long time and it still feels far away. No matter how many podcasts you listen to, how many books you read, how many body positive and intuitive eating instagram accounts you follow you still can’t seem to break through and be free from this…. You still may be Thinking it’ll work this time - but if you are doing it the same way you’ve always done, thinking things will change, is just another diet mentality. 

If it’s been years of trying to do this intuitive eating, body acceptance thing and you don’t see an end in sight, why not be open to getting support to get you there faster and have confidence that there is a way out and a new life out there full of freedom? 


Maybe you’ve just started this work and you’re very new to all of this - you’re excited and ready to dive into being an UnDieter. 


So how about instead of trudging through for a couple years, get support now to dive in strong and get to freedom faster, it’s been too much time wasted on obsessing over food !

What’s the value for you in getting support on your journey?

1. A safe space- A place to go when you have a rough day - we can talk you off the ledge. 

Halt the spiral. Always feel like you’re being “held”. No matter what day it is during the week, you know you have a safe portal to turn to with like minded women working on the same thing as you to reach out for support and guidance in whatever it is you may need. 


2. The brain that is keeping you from feeling free around food and your body isn’t going to be the brain (and only support system)  that gets you out of it. - getting another perspective/ support system is invaluable. Allow someone else to get in your brain and smooth out the kinds that may be keeping you stuck. 


3. You don’t know what you don’t know - allow someone to help you with the blocks. If there’s something that could be really helpful to your in your process with UnDieting - but you don’t even know what it could possibly be to help you- how can you make it through without someone opening your mind to new ideas and possibilities? Let some help you from the outside in! 


4. Asking for help can be hard- it’s okay to surrender to the process. This is a big one because a lot of people (especially women) think they need to put everyone else first. They sacrifice themselves for the sake of their kids or family or just makes excuses that they don’t deserve it or don’t need it. But the thing is- putting yourself first, prioritizing your needs, getting yourself to a healthy mental place would be such an advantage for your family and anyone in your life. You can also teach others around you that it’s okay to do nice things for yourself. You could inspire change in others. Getting help isn’t shameful- it’s courageous! You can’t pour from an empty cup which is why it’s important to fill your cup so you can overflow to others around you that count on you.  Allow yourself to get the guidance that you deserve to be free. This is for you first and foremost and also indirectly for the people you love. 


If you have gotten support before and you feel like it didn’t work- get curious to why you feel this way. Did you connect with the person you worked with?

Did you feel aligned in what they were telling you? Were you taking on all the advice and really putting it into action? We’ve had some people in our lives that we’ve hired that felt like they didn’t help and we know that everything teaches you something - so we move on, take our lessons, and on to the next. Just because one or 2 people didn’t work out for you doesn’t mean to give up altogether- if you feel it in your gut go with that- and it may be with us or it may not. Listen to that intuition and take risks! 


Clearly we are saying here that we are here to support you and we urge you to take the help.


But regardless of if you end up working with us or not, we want to give you an activity that will help you begin opening up more to the support around you in your life that us dieters often push away in EVERY aspect of our lives.


3 steps to take to become more supported in your life:


  1. Accept it when it’s given. Your first response might be of course! But you might be surprised how often you brush off support of all kinds (especially if you used to be a dieter). 

Really take a look at your reaction when:

  • People give you compliments -- is it usually, oh this old thing? It’s nothing…. No more of that, accept the support. Say, thank you.. Period.
  • When people offer small acts of kindness - your friend that offers to buy you coffee, the stranger thats holding the door, does it feel awkward?
  • When someone working in a store asks if you need any help, theres way too often that even I myself, will say no and then spend 10 minutes looking for what I want!! 

2. Go above and beyond and ask for what you need:

  • Sometimes support doesnt arrive on a silver platter and we need to ask for it ourselves
  • Take the initiative this week to:
  • Ask your spouse to help with xyz
  • Ask the clerk in the store where the ____ is
  • Ask a friend to chat if youre needing someone to talk to


The female martyr role is just too common, we cant do it all and we dont have to.

This doesnt help anyone, when you’re feeling supported and fulfilled, you are a better human for it!


3. Ask for something scary:

  • Afraid to ask your mom to stop talking about her diet?
  • Nervous about asking for a refund on something you werent happy with?
  • We double dare you!


Becoming brave in asking for what you want will always benefit you and those around you.

The answer to an unasked question is always no.

That being said, we want to share about our upcoming program called The UnDiet Academy! We open the doors in November 11th ! So mark your calendars and get on the waitlist if you have any interest to get support - this may be the exact program you are looking for. 

It’s a 90 day program with 13 modules. You get live coaching to answer any questions you may have along the course and you get a FB group filled with like minded women who are taking the course along side you.

We share the EXACT UnDieting Process that 100s of women have gone through while working with us and have found their freedom around food and their bodies.

No more points, no more weigh ins, no more feeling guilty for eating foods that you choose, no more bingeing- if you are feeling that nudge to join us in November - then listen, your inner guidance is trying to tell you something. 

Get on the waitlist here: and you’ll get all the details. 

See you next week! 

PS - Don't forget to grab your worksheet here -


Lauren and Jenna

Restriction is damaging - yes always.

Before we get started you can download a worksheet that goes along with this episode at

This episode was inspired by one of our clients that posted in the current group of The UnDiet Academy. 

The topic was about restriction and if you could do it in a healthy way (for your mind, body, and soul)- someone out in the IG world was claiming that there is something called Restriction Love. 

While we respect the opinions of others - we also like to fiercely protect our community from very misinformed and harmful perspectives.

We want to let you know our 2 cents on restriction and what it really means - which also doesn’t mean you have to eat endless amounts of sugar just because you allow all food and don’t restrict yourself. 


Note: restriction doesnt just cover meal plans and counting calories. Even things like “Watching what you eat”, “just trying to eat healthier” … these ways of eating are restrictive. There is something that is trying to be avoided and limitations that you are trying to stay in.

As a dieter, when you deny yourself food that you want, it creates a very unhealthy relationship with food and your body. You are signaling to your body that it’s bad and wrong to eat certain food. Your body and mind is filled with guilt and shame. You feel confined, and there is no freedom of choice… 

There are so many nuances when it comes to restriction but one of the biggest downfalls of restriction is almost inevitable bingeing …. No matter what you do, if you do not stop restricting, the bingeing cannot end. 

What you resist persists. The more we restrict, the stronger the desire to eat all the food, the more obsession you feel, and the constant thoughts about food become louder and louder. 

There is no way you can come from a good place when talking about restriction.

Restriction doesn’t give you a choice, it doesn’t allow you to tune into your body, and it sure as heck doesn’t come from a place of love- it comes from a place of shame, guilt, and obeying the diet rules. 

You can’t trick yourself into restricting effectively - if you are restricting when you want something and there’s a hope of weight loss or some body change the cycle will never end. 

We want to share with you how you can live a life as an UnDieter, have freedom and be able to make empowered choices, and never restrict yourself.

And no it doesn’t mean that you are going to be eating endless amounts of sugar (OH THE HORROR!!).

Just so you know, restricting sugar (or any food) isn’t actually going to make you eat less of it - it actually does the opposite and most likely will make you eat more than you wanted in the first place and an even better chance that you’ll binge on it. 

So how the heck to feel good in your body, have wellness without the obsession, and not restrict food? 

So to start, if you are restricting (physically or mentally) the first thing to do is to stop that. We know it can feel scary but that’s the first step - it’s giving yourself unconditional permission to eat. There may be a phase where you are eating things that you haven’t in a while more often  and that’s okay!! Allow allow allow allow- we promise you will stop eating the thing- when you eat something with permission there’s an immediate shift in your brain and over time it gets easier and easier.

It’s about EMPOWERED CHOICE - instead of seeing anything as restriction- it’s seeing it as a powerful choice that comes from your truth. If you know eating a lot of dairy can upset your stomach - it’s okay to choose to pass or choose to eat a smaller amount because it’s what honors your body. It’s not restricting dairy - it’s making a choice from the signals in your body with some logic - it’s about what is best for you and maybe that means eating a bunch of cheesy pizza even if that may upset your stomach. You are not right or wrong for the choices that you make. It all comes down to you and what makes you feel good in your body. 

Checking the intention behind the choices that you make - did you pass on the cookies even though you wanted them because you felt like they were bad or were going to make you gain weight? Or did you pass on the cookies because you just had a nice satisfying dinner and you just feel too full to eat the cookies even though they look and smell delicious? There’s a HUGE difference between passing on the cookies. The first example is restriction, the second example is honoring your body. Just calling restriction, honoring yourself doesn’t make it “loving”, the intention and internal thought process truly needs to change.

Sometimes a bite is all you need (or however much) - restriction leads us to not listening to our bodies and not using our intuition. When we constantly deny dessert because we think we shouldnt be eating it every night that only leads to more obsession and most likely eating more dessert than what we would have eaten if we just allowed ourselves to have it when we first wanted it - 


Do you see how allowing gives you the opportunity to actually eat in a way that feels good and it doesn't come from a place of restriction?

Not that this is the point at ALL - but not restricting can lead to eating less, solely because you are allowing yourself and listening and now coming from a place of “the last supper” or fear of not knowing when the next time you’ll be eating the thing you want  - why do you think most people eat the entire pint of ben and jerry’s in one sitting?

Because they don’t know when they’ll get it again- so might as well eat it all. When restriction doesn’t exist - you may just have a few bites, or half or the whole thing doesn’t really matter but the thing is, you know you can have it tomorrow if you want so it doesn’t seem as special, therefore allowing you to eat with your body signals and not the obsessive desire to binge. 

It’s a mindset shift!!!

It’s making choices that honor you and your body without making one choice better or worse. It’s allowing yourself to live without the diet rules and have the freedom to choose and not be guilted or shamed for eating the ice cream and chips and not praised for eating the salad and Chicken and broccoli. It’s ALL okay because that’s what you chose- end of story. 

So to close, restriction is what got you stuck in the diet cycle in the first place, so it absolutely won’t be the thing that sets you free. 

There’s a life outside restriction and that’s called wellness without the obsession which still allows you to care about feeling good and making choices that honor your wellness (and that means sometimes eating the cookies and sometimes passing on the cookies- it’s being able to have it all and knowing your self worth at the same time.) 

Don’t forget you can download the worksheet to help you process through this episode! 

The UnDiet Academy begins in November - you can get on the waitlist at:

See you next week! 

Welcome to How to Love Your Body we are Lauren and Jenna your UnDieting coaches. On this podcast you will get weekly coaching that is straightforward and actually useable on your journey to food and body freedom. 

Today we are going to be talking about willpower, what it really is, why you think you don’t have enough of it and why it's all complete BS!

There is a worksheet that goes with today’s episode that you can find at

This worksheet will help you work along with the episode so instead of just listening and nodding your head you can actually begin implementing some change in your mindset and your life.

So what is willpower really?

The most accurate definition we found was this: control of one's impulses and actions; determination; self-control.

So what kind of things do we use willpower (self control, controlling our impulses) for?

What dont we use it for?

We use willpower when:

We refrain from yelling at our children

We are kind to our partners when they forgot to pick up the milk AGAIN

When we focus at work instead of watching youtube videos which is what we actually want to do

When we say no to that cookie even thought we really really want it

When we dont get out of our car and chase after that fool that just cut you off 

When we dont tell our friend to quit her complaining already and just leave him…

Modern society takes A LOT of self control to function well in…

So when you use all that willpower up on your diet? Guess what happens….

There’s none left for life.

This is why we get snappy, more irritable and lash out more easily when we are restricting food, not only are we hangry but we have no willpower left in our reserves.

Because willpower is a depleting thing… not like a muscle where the more you use it, the stronger it gets. 

So -- do we want to be using all of our willpower (which inevitably runs out and leads to binge eating/ overdoing it on the weekends) or do we want to live a smooth and happy life overall and let the food take care of itself?

If willpower is a part of the way you eat… it CANNOT last a lifetime. It’s physically impossible.

So what do we do instead?

We drop the use of willpower all together.

So just eat everything and feel horrible and let myself go? Just give up??


It’s just taking a completely different approach that will lead you to the wellness without the obsession that you’ve been looking for all along.

When you go through the entire Undieting process (more on the specifics of this coming in the next few episodes) - you find that you have an ebb and flow, a flexibility with food, you never had before.

No willpower needed. But there are choices to be made.

Once you’ve done the mindset work, and truly are embodying intuitive eating and the undiet way of living you just make the best choice for you in the present moment.

Does right now that cookie sound amazing and your body is on board with it? Awesome enjoy!

Are you stuffed from dinner and those stale cookies are staring at you from the counter? Well…you can choose to eat them or not, no right or wrong but maybe a stale, mediocre cookie when youre super full from dinner won’t feel too great.

It’s about having the tools and the mindset to be able to make choices in the moment that serve you well and leave you feeling empowered and NEVER restricted.

Since willpower is never used here, it never runs out. You can actually maintain this way of life for the rest of your life.

So how can you start letting go of the concept of willpower around food?



  • Recognize that you’ve always had “enough” willpower and forgive yourself for past (what you might see as) shortcomings.



In your worksheet you can dive more into this (writing it down will help you create this change a lot more effectively than just listening to this will)….

Identify some past instances where you beat yourself up for not having enough willpower and rewrite the story -- ACTUALLY it makes complete sense that every weekend after restricting myself and using up all my willpower I let it all go on the weekend.



  • Figure out what you need to begin working on/ implementing in order to let go of willpower around food.



What are the reasons you feel you need to have “self control” or control your impulses when it comes to food? What do you feel will happen if you let go of this ?

Some examples might be: Everytime I have even 1 cookie I end up eating a whole row, or if I let myself eat pizza I would order it every night… get those worst case scenarios down on paper…


Now what would need to happen for these things to stop.

Likely things such as : allow all food so food is just food and it doesnt have so much power over me...

Repair my relationship with my body so I don’t feel like Im always inadequate and constantly need to be on the hunt for weight loss…

Stop seeing food as good or bad.. I dont feel like I would go out of control with salad, so whats that all about?

These arent things you can snap your fingers and have but they will give you personal insight into what needs work so you can move forward in a productive direction. This is all about self awareness - which without, we cant move anywhere!


  • Decide 1 step you’re going to make to more forward with this.


If you feel body image is the #1 thing you want to work on so you don’t have to be using willpower around food so much, decide 1 action step you can take to get closer to at least a neutral relationship with your body. Does that mean thanking it every morning for something it does instead of the way it looks?

If you want to begin allowing all food choose 1 food you are going to begin allowing yourself to eat unconditionally, yes this may result in eating quite a bit of that food at first but it won’t be that way forever.

If you are sick of the baby steps, you can always have a peek at The UnDiet Academy where we lead you down the complete path to being an UnDieter - body mind and soul :) 

You can get more info at and if you add yourself to the waitlist you’ll be the first to get information when we open the doors in late October/ Early November, exact dates will be sent out soon to those on the list.

Simply enter your email at to get that info!

Send us a DM on Instagram @thebodylovesociety and tell us your stories about willpower and what you will work on to move way from having to use it with food!

You can absolutely get back in the drivers seat and have an effortless and joyful relationship with food and your body - no more restrictions, limitations and willpower needed :) 

See you next week and dont forget to grab your willpower worksheet at

Love, Lauren and Jenna

On this week's episode of How to Love Your Body we combined a very loaded question that we have gotten over the years, so we decided to put it all into one episode.

We are going to be addressing:

  • How to be an UnDieter even if you have food allergies that cause restrictions/ medical restrictions.
  • Also touch on a question that we get often “if it’s safe to go vegan/ vegetarian without spiraling back into dieting even though there are many restrictions.”
  • Lastly one of our listeners left us a review (thank you!) - and asked if we could touch on how to navigate food restrictions that are ethics based (and still follow IE/ UnDieting).

Here's a worksheet you can download- "How to make sure your medical/ethical restrictions don’t become a slippery slope back into the diet mentality!"- Get it here.


Before we begin- we are not licensed dietitians so anything we share is solely from our own experiences and opinions - Take what resonates, leave what doesn’t, and always, always, always consult a professional if your health is at risk or for any matter!

Let’s dive in…

1. How to be an UnDieter with Food Allergies

Food allergies or medical restrictions can make you feel restricted and that is the exact feeling we are trying to get away from when we UnDiet - so how do we marry the two together?

First off - the mindset of CHOOSING to not partake in these foods needs to be present, if we think about it like “we can’t”, or “the doctor told me not to”, it feels like a rule that wants to be broken!

When it’s your own empowered choice daily to forgo certain foods it feels a lot more peaceful, because in reality it is a choice. If a food makes you feel sick, you can choose to eat it and feel sick or you can choose to not eat it and not feel sick - honestly neither choice is right or wrong, but its your choice to make.

Even for Jenna as someone with celiac disease, she can choose to eat gluten and increase her chances greatly of getting colon cancer later in life (and other complications and damage) or she can choose not to eat it.

The other shift you need to make is to not associate your allergy with being “healthier” - in the diety sense of the term.

We spoke to a client who was wondering if gluten free bread etc was healthier than the regular stuff -- that’s not the point (because usually it's not, gluten free options are often more processed with more ingredients ). If you can’t eat gluten, you aren’t eating it to try to eat “healthier” options, you’re doing it because your body doesn't react to it well.

Let go of restriction = healthier and embrace EVERY alternative that you can

Can’t eat gluten? Go out and find this!

  • GF pizza
  • GF breads
  • GF cookies
  • GF cakes, pies, desserts
  • GF pasta

Just for-going these foods all together will feel very restrictive and make you feel like you’re on a diet all over again.

You can also do this with dairy free alternatives etc.

Go out and find the alternative that you enjoy!

2. Is it safe to go vegan/ vegetarian without spiraling back into dieting even though there are many restrictions.

What’s your intention behind being vegan/ vegetarian? Is there diet culture in your intention or is it your genuine authentic choice because it serves you best? Does it have to be so black and white?

We've seen someone say they are “predominantly plant based” meaning they mostly eat veggie and sometimes meat- also do you have to label yourself? Can you just eat the way that feels best to you and if that’s mostly plant based then great but if one day you have meat it doesn't need to mean anything?

The second you announce to the world or your family you are now a vegan / veggie - the pressure kicks in and you feel turmoil if you “cheat” around people you told you are vegan etc…

Of course you only know what’s best for you and what honors your body / mental health- we'd say if there isn’t a big reason (like religious/ ethic/ allergy) for being vegetarian/ vegan to not dive back into such a slippery slope of restriction (if you see it that way).

We’ve seen from experience that once someone calls themselves a vegetarian or vegan they slip back into dieting feelings - we had a client who did that and it lasted for a few days before she caught herself and knew it wasn't good for her… Are you masking something ? Lauren did vegan and most of it was hiding disordered eating - now she loves vegan / veggie meals but she doesn't label herself- she eats it all!



3. How to navigate food restrictions that are ethics based (and still follow IE/ UnDieting)


If you choose to eat / not eat certain things based on your own morals/ ethics - great. That is completely okay AND you can still be intuitive and live as an UnDieter.

It’s really about shifting your mindset about WHY you are doing what you are doing - if you choose not to eat something because you don’t agree with the company - that’s not diet culture and that’s not food restriction. That is believing in something you care about and following what feels aligned with you. You are making a powerful choice with your beliefs not with diet mentality.

If you don’t eat meat / eat certain things that come from an immoral company that doesn’t mean you can’t find what you want in a version that works for you- there are many meat alternatives that you can satisfy your cravings with. Be your own best advocate and find things that replace what you really enjoy in a way that works for you!

As for a company - ex. If it’s a sandwich company that is owned by someone who is involved in something you are not in alignment with - you don’t ever have to eat there. PASS. That’s great. AND if you love sandwiches from this place but choose to not eat there anymore- go explore and find a new favorite sandwich place. There are options even when choosing to no eat something based on ethics.


The point- you can have food allergies, you can follow your morals, you can be vegan/ vegetarian or not be vegan/ vegetarian and you can still live a life as an UnDieter.

You don’t need to see anything as restriction - you see it as honoring your mind and your body. You see it as a powerful choice (and it doesn't always have to be the same choice, it can ebb and flow). And if there is diet mentality in there- you know it’s not about morals/ ethics/ allergies - it’s a red flag showing you that there’s some work to do underneath the surface so you can heal your relationship with food and your body and find your freedom.

Don't forget to grab your WORKSHEET here.

Talk soon!

Love, Lauren and Jenna

PS. Be sure to follow us on Instagram @thebodylovesociety, we offer coaching and tips and tools daily to make your journey to food and body freedom that much easier.

It’s not that they are bad - it’s that we think they're bad and we judge the heck out of them -- and they can most likely send us spiraling into body image thoughts with lots of shame and judgement. So we would like to share how to cope with them so they don’t take you down. Here's a worksheet you can download to help you with the process.

We have all had those days when you are going about your life- maybe scrolling on social media, you see a memory/ timeline share on Facebook, or you're going through your camera roll on your phone and BAM you see a photo that makes your stomach drop followed by lots of judgement and mean comments about yourself.

You zero in on the photo and pick apart every body part that you don’t like, every squish, everything… and that may lead you into a spiral of catastrophic thinking…

You start to think you need to lose weight, if you should start a diet, what you should stop eating, how you can start exercising more… it never ends.

So here’s how we want to help you cope.


We want to give you a 3 step process to use when dealing with bad photos

  1. Acknowledge and validate

    Acknowledge & validate your feelings. It's okay to have the feelings you have.

  2. Zoom Out
    Get a birds eye view of what is actually happening - noticing what's around you.

  3. Gratitude
    What are you grateful for?


STEP 1: Acknowledge and validate your feelings- It's okay to initially have these feelings- it's what you do with these feelings that matter.

STEP 2: "Zoom Out" - What is actually happening in this photo other than what your body looks like? Are you having fun? Are you creating memories? Is there anything special about this day in this photo? What can you notice?

STEP 3: Snapping yourself out of body thoughts and into your present life can bring you from judgement to gratitude- What are 2-5 things that you feel grateful for when you shifted your body image thoughts and "Zoomed Out" instead?


A couple more helpful tips....

  • Stop the urges to dive deeper into catastrophic thinking. Wanting to go compare your old pictures to how you look now? STOP! Want to take a picture of yourself in those old jeans to see how they look? STOP!
  • Stopping yourself from getting deeper is very important. When you’re in a moment of freak out over a picture of yourself, step away and go do something else, diving in deeper will not help anything.


Love, Lauren and Jenna

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