4 Common Barriers Preventing You from Becoming an Intuitive Eater

Hi Welcome to How to love your body. I'm Lauren McAulay and this is Jenna Free and we are intuitive eating counsellors from The Body Love Society and the app The UnDiet Collective.

This podcast is for you if you are working to take action in becoming an intuitive eater and undieter instead of just constantly learning about it and listening to 100652 interviews.

This podcast is brought to you by our NEW intuitive eating quiz that you can take at bit.ly/undietquiz

Take the quick quiz to know what your barrier is in the way that you’re tackling this journey.

Lets dive in to todays episode.

We are talking about 4 barriers that can hold people up from finding food and body freedom. We are talking about the WAY that you’re going about it.

UnDieting is SO different than dieting that we really need to tackle it in a different way and this might not even occur to a dieter because its just the way we think!

1. The first barrier is:

Consistency and Longevity

This is the #1 thing that gets people stuck in limbo, not dieting but not getting to where they want to go (feeling like food is easy and theyre at peace in their bodies).

Where dieters get stuck:

We’ve been used to hard sprints and then falling off the wagon. Think 30 day challenges, having a personal trainer for 3 months or starting weight watchers with all your efforts just to quit a month later.

This is NOT the energy that will work in becoming an intuitive eater.

The way you need to tackle this work is to truly understand that this is the rest of your life - don’t obsess over this thinking you’re going to crack the code in 2 months, everything will be perfect and you can then stop thinking about it at all.

It’s a slow burn.

It’s about daily, small steps forward. 

You NEED the time to explore what works for you, to dive deep into the mindset work and to let time reveal to you where your struggles are and what you still need to work on.

If you go too hard too fast you will burn out, think - this doesn’t work and move on, probably back to another diet and that is the last thing we want for you.

So the next time you’re freaking out about this not happening fast enough remember - I’ve got the rest of my life to continue to work on this (of course it gets easier with time and you’ll master certain things but there will always be something you’re working on especially when it comes to mindset). 

Also reflect, am I doing something daily to get me to where I want to go? THIS is a key component of this work.

2. The second barrier is:

Community

This is a lonely road to take. I’m sure you’ve noticed that, everyone around you is counting their points and talking about how they need to be good today --- and you’re pulling your hair out. 

Here’s why this might be holding up your progress.

When no one around you gets it, and might be actively pushing against or disagreeing with what you’re doing it’s difficult to be confident enough in what you’re doing to move forward. If you keep thinking - am I crazy? Is this not the right thing? Maybe I should be doing that program with my friend, look how good she looks?

It keeps you in limbo. You need a group that GETS IT. People who can reassure you when it’s tough and celebrate your wins because we KNOW what a win it is to be able to have cookies in the house and not eat them all the first day.

Community will give you the time and space to build up your conviction enough to be able to set and hold your boundaries with the dieters around you.

So if you are feeling in limbo or are often questioning what you’re doing look around you - do you have community to reach out to and get support from?

3. The third barrier is:

Action (or lack there of)

Information overload is a HUGE trap that UnDieters can get stuck in. Dieting taught us just learn all the things, know the foods to eat that are good and bad and you will master your body!

This is not how Intuitive Eating or UnDieting works and it’s why we’ve worked with many clients that have been working at this for a year or more but it’s still not clicking, it’s all just information in their minds. They GET IT and want it but it just isn’t translating to embodying this work and living an intuitive life.

You need to start taking action and implementing this work into your life. But that can be really hard when you read a 200 page book, love the info but then think - wait, where do I even start??

If you’ve been at this for a while ask yourself - am I stuck in information overload where it feels like I’m progressing but then when I’m done the book or even listening to a podcast I don’t actually take much action and then I’m back where I started…

Taking one small action is going to be worth more than ALL the IE knowledge out there.

 

4. The last barrier is:

Affordability

This one is less in our control and more of a logistical barrier. But hello, one therapy session can be upwards of $200… and one session is amazing as we are strong advocates of therapy but one session isn’t the end of all your healing and transformation. 

If this has been a barrier please know it’s not just you, privilege is a big part of this work. Yeah if you can afford to work with someone privately that’s amazing and is such a big help (but even then it’s usually 50 mins a week, where does your support come from the other 167 hrs a week).

So if you are working with someone 1:1 that’s so great AND you may be searching for some kind of support on the other 6 days you aren’t with your coach/ therapist. 

If you aren’t working with someone 1:1 / some group program because it’s just too much to invest - that’s okay too - there is something out there for you that will take care of this barrier. Something we are working on! 

 

This is why we wanted to create this quiz “Find the 1 ingredient you're missing that will make Intuitive Eating easier.” This will help you get to the bottom of what the number one thing is that will help you in your process with Intuitive Eating and UnDieting. Once you take the quiz and get your 1 ingredient, the quiz will give you action steps on how to keep moving forward. You can take the quiz at bit.ly/undietquiz

Reach out and let us know if you have any q’s- follow us on @theundietcollective if you haven’t yet. 

See you next week! 

Welcome to How to Love Your Body on Today’s episode we are going to be talking about how to tell if you are listening to your body or listening to your head. There are so many tiny nuances in IE and this is one of them.

This is actually a really important distinction between the two. Yes our body and our brains come together and make decisions - so really we are using both when choosing what we want to eat. 

But if we skip our body's input when choosing food that is when we most likely hear “I’m so full, why do I always do that, I’m allowing all food but this doesn’t feel good.” Of course there is nothing wrong with any of that - you can be full, it’s okay if you “do that”, and it’s also okay not to feel good - yeah it’s not comfortable but it doesn’t mean you're horrible and a failure. 

Lauren's story: 

So we talk about this often but really how this came to be is that I experienced this first hand just a couple of nights ago- I kinda had an off day with eating, I ate enough but it just wasn’t as satisfying because xyz and all the things that don’t really matter - when it came to dinner time - I was feeding the kids and also sitting to eat myself and although I was eating something I enjoyed my brain was grazing. I was wondering if I should eat more of the same thing or get something sweet or when the kids go to bed to make myself another snack or something - I was searching and searching and was quite annoyed because this isn’t something that usually happens to me after dinner - usually after dinner I feel complete - I’ve eaten enough that satisfies me, i get the kids to bed, and after that I usually have some chocolate or ice cream and that feels great. So when my “typical” night wasn’t happening - I was annoyed! I was checking in and asking myself what I need? If I need to go eat something sweet right now - just go and do it. I can also have something after the kids go to bed - I was allowing but it still didn't feel “right” - I was in my head. I also realized that i was feeling a little off that night - I was home with the kids alone - I was feeling certain emotions about certain things - which is fine - and then I was like okay well maybe I’m feeling some feelings and I just need some food to comfort me - I then said, okay well if you need to eat that’s fine - go ahead and do it! There’s nothing wrong with that - I was giving myself full permission to do whatever I needed to do - and then I asked myself how does my body feel? And that was the shift right there. I literally felt myself drop from my head into my body. I realized all the chatter was all going on up in my head. I wasn’t considering my body at all. When I dropped into my body I could tell that I actually felt content and wasn’t actually hungry - I still gave myself permission to eat whatever I wanted / emotionally eat if I wanted to but since I was back in my body I realized eating something wouldn’t “fix” anything - because I wasn’t actually hungry - it would have not made me feel good in my body because actually my dinner was satisfying and filling. 

This may seem like a story that has an intention of getting yourself not to eat something - that’s not the case here - because later when the kids went to bed I went and got an ice cream because I was ready for it (taste buds and body!)

So why share this - I felt the shift between my head and my body so intensely - like it was a visceral AH HA moment that I was like “ohhhhhh wooooow I didn’t even realize how stuck I was in my head” - dropping into your body is so important when Intuitive Eating… 

Jenna’s story: 

I vividly remember one time when I was at Starbucks - of course and I was in line (pre pandemic) and I was waiting thinking … ugh I don't feel like a coffee but I want one,,, and I was debating if i should leave or stay. Starbucks is my favorite and I did want a coffee but it was like my body was screaming at me, no thank you that would not feel good.

But I stayed in line, my mind thinking hmmm what's going on here and then when I thought of an iced coffee my body was like yes ok I can get on board with that. 

I was hot.

I was too hot and thinking of a coffee made me feel a little ill  but when I switched it to an iced coffee in my thoughts my body eased into it.

This work is so intangible in so many ways so these stories might sound like we’re being imaginative but my body literally leaned into it when I thought of an iced coffee and my stomach felt queasy when I was thinking about a latte. 

So here are 3 steps to drop into your body and not live in your head when choosing food/ eating food. 

Step 1: Pretend like there’s an off switch and from the head up you turn it off - it goes dark - and from the neck down you have an on switch - and the light is on - you are only focusing what is going on from the neck down. 

Step 2: When you are choosing to eat / want more of something / feeling grazy - instead of listening to your thoughts - ask your body some questions.(Remember your head is “dark” the switch is turned off - you can’t be in there for the time being ) - Your body is the only thing powered on-  What sensations do I feel in my body? What is my stomach feeling like? This step it to get aware of what’s going on in your body and how you are feeling. 

Step 3: Pretend as if you are eating the food you want - imagine tasting it. Imagine what it would feel like in your body - do you have a sense of - yes that feels good or hmmm I don't think that will feel great. It doesn't matter what you choose to eat! This is just getting you to really tune into your body. 

Can you relate to saying -- I just can’t have X in my house - I can stop when I eat other things but X is impossible for me - We’d have to question that - next time you eat this thing - go through these 3 steps and drop into your body while eating them. Before/ during/after you eat - DROP in and see what comes from it! 

Keep reminding yourself of the 3 steps and use it as gaining more awareness - it doesn’t mean this will make you eat less - it may mean you want to eat more! It can be anything! Also, you can absolutely choose to eat something even if your body is saying im full - emotionally eating is absolutely acceptable too even if your body doesn’t want the whole pint of ice cream - if you choose that - it’s okay!! This is about helping you make empowered choices - instead of being unaware - you get to have full awareness of what is going on in your body and your brain and make the choice - and whatever that choice is - is YOUR choice. 

Our app, The UnDiet Collective launches in the app store on Feb 1 ! We can’t wait to share it with you - we’ll be rolling out more details in the next few weeks but think easy access to intuitive eating, body image, mindset, and community support at the tips of your fingers - OFF Facebook, that gives you small actions steps and tips without making it overwhelming or confusing. It’s a one stop shop for all your needs when continuing the process in becoming an UnDieter - not to mention it’s affordable and high value. 

Get on the waitlist - bit.ly/tblsappwaitlist  and follow us on instagram @theundietcollective to get an exclusive offer on Feb 1 only for those following this account.

Hello and welcome to How to love your body, welcome to our first episode of 2021! Today we are talking about new year’s resolutions why we keep doing them even when they don’t work and what we can do instead!

1. We’re sold the idea of a fresh start when the calendar turns to January, we think things will be different this time, the things in our life we don’t like will shift and we will be new people! (Also being told that weight loss is life changing doesn’t help)

The first step here is just realizing this isn't true. The best way to do this is to look at your own evidence. How have the new year’s of your past been? Were they profound shifts that gave you a new life every year? Probably not. … And there isn’t something you haven't figured out yet that will make it different. It’s just that a change in the calendar year doesn't actually have an effect on anything at all. If you want to make changes in an area of your life, just do it when you want to do it. No need to wait for new years. This just leads to the whole “Ill start again on Monday effect”, especially when it comes to dieting, new years is the ultimate Monday. This leads people to having a last supper for ALL of december with the promise of a fresh new start on Jan 1 ! This all or nothing thinking is not helpful. Step 1 in getting out of the new years resolution rut is to stop giving January so much significance!

2. The New Year seems like a good time to get motivated and dive into something that gives us purpose and feelings of success. This is a HUGE driver of why people continue dieting long after it feels good and we trudge through even with all of the negative side effects.

With a lot of people we work with . they share that not dieting just feels complacent, it’s boring, it’s stagnant, it can feel like giving up or letting yourself go. We are used to drama and so called accomplishments when it comes to what we eat and what we weigh. This can be addicting even when its negatively affecting you..

The key here is to foster these natural desires of achievement, success, progression and purpose into something more worthwhile (and effective). 

This doesn’t mean shifting one obsession for another but having something you’re working towards or working on can give us so much energy and excitement. For Lauren and I that definitely shifted from dieting to this work. Instead of feeling like I always want to improve and be working on my body, I have this amazing work to continue getting better at, to share new things and create new things for you and it does give me a sense of purpose and progress that dieting used to (but in a much healthier way).

What about finding that for yourself this year? What is something you want to work towards that takes effort and time? It can be simple like learning to play the ukulele or learning how to knit, it could be starting a business or going back to school. Whatever it is, pick something that sounds exciting to you, makes you want to keep working at it, and gives you joy and a sense of accomplishment as you continue to work towards something.

3. Most resolutions are fear based/ have a fixing energy. Our society runs like this so this is how we make resolutions - media tells us to buy this and buy that to fix these things about yourself so that is how we tackle resolutions. That never works long term - so we are motivated to make a resolution from a sense of lack and needing to fix something that is negative about ourselves but this burns out quickly. 

You can still do something new in the new year without it being about fixing, instead it can be about self exploration and adding good things into your life.

A great new resource we have for this is our UnDiet January Calendar, it gives you one small thing to do each day to work towards being an UnDieter. It includes intuitive eating, body image, self care and gentle movement. 

You can grab that at bit.ly/undietjan 

PS - We started a new instagram account for our upcoming app called The UnDiet Collective so definitely come join us on there! - this is also where you can watch the trailer for our upcoming documentary called Behind the Before and After!

 Today's episode is a replay on Improving your body image. We go through the different areas of body image and many tips on how to work through the struggles.

We also have a limited time Holiday Deal on both of our $21 Intensives. We will be offering the 21 Day Body Image Intensive and the 21 Day Weight Gain WTF Intensive for 1/2 price through December 31st, 2020.

Get the Body Image Intensive Workbook for $10 here. 

Get the Weight Gain WTF Workbook for $10 here.

December 22, 2020

Ep 138 - Intuitive Eating 101

Welcome to How to Love Your Body - on today’s episode we are going to bring it back to the basics and talk about What is Intuitive Eating? We want to share the 10 principles with you that were created by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch - These are amazing principles! We also want to share that there is more to these principles in this work.

In the work that we do at the body love society we use two terms, UnDieting and intuitive eating. In essence they’re really the same thing, getting away from dieting and listening to your body so you can take great care of yourself without the focus being on weight.

At the core it’s really about thinking in a new way that is based on science, compassion and sustainability. A life of wellness that isn’t fuelled by diet culture’s obsession with thinness.

The reason this is important work is because it can be so easy to live in diet culture, diet decade after decade, have it not work long term, feel like a failure and keep going around and around in the diet cycle without ever KNOWING there’s another way, without questioning if this is actually damaging our bodies and mental health.

That being said - what is intuitive eating? It is the base of our work so it’s important to talk about.

Intuitive Eating is a concept by registered dietitians Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch, first published in 1995. They put it together into ten principles and laid it out so people understand it but it TRULY is intuitive. Many people do these things naturally if diet culture didn’t mess them up too much. So it is a naturally occurring way of being but Evelyn and Elyse put it together beautifully so we can all benefit from it.

The 10 principles of IE are:

Reject the Diet Mentality (THE MOST IMPORTANT!)

Throw out the diet books and magazine articles that offer you the false hope of losing weight quickly, easily, and permanently. Get angry at diet culture that promotes weight loss and the lies that have led you to feel as if you were a failure every time a new diet stopped working and you gained back all of the weight. If you allow even one small hope to linger that a new and better diet or food plan might be lurking around the corner, it will prevent you from being free to rediscover Intuitive Eating.

2. Honor Your Hunger

Keep your body biologically fed with adequate energy and carbohydrates. Otherwise you can trigger a primal drive to overeat. Once you reach the moment of excessive hunger, all intentions of moderate, conscious eating are fleeting and irrelevant. Learning to honor this first biological signal sets the stage for rebuilding trust in yourself and in food.

3. Make Peace with Food

Call a truce; stop the food fight! Give yourself unconditional permission to eat. If you tell yourself that you can’t or shouldn’t have a particular food, it can lead to intense feelings of deprivation that build into uncontrollable cravings and, often, bingeing. When you finally “give in” to your forbidden foods, eating will be experienced with such intensity it usually results in Last Supper overeating and overwhelming guilt.

4. Challenge the Food Police

Scream a loud no to thoughts in your head that declare you’re “good” for eating minimal calories or “bad” because you ate a piece of chocolate cake. The food police monitor the unreasonable rules that diet culture has created. The police station is housed deep in your psyche, and its loudspeaker shouts negative barbs, hopeless phrases, and guilt-provoking indictments. Chasing the food police away is a critical step in returning to Intuitive Eating. 

5. Discover the Satisfaction Factor

The Japanese have the wisdom to keep pleasure as one of their goals of healthy living. In our compulsion to comply with diet culture, we often overlook one of the most basic gifts of existence—the pleasure and satisfaction that can be found in the eating experience. When you eat what you really want, in an environment that is inviting, the pleasure you derive will be a powerful force in helping you feel satisfied and content. By providing this experience for yourself, you will find that it takes just the right amount of food for you to decide you’ve had “enough.”

6. Feel Your Fullness

In order to honor your fullness, you need to trust that you will give yourself the foods that you desire.  Listen for the body signals that tell you that you are no longer hungry. Observe the signs that show that you’re comfortably full. Pause in the middle of eating and ask yourself how the food tastes, and what your current hunger level is. 

7. Cope with Your Emotions with Kindness

First, recognize that food restriction, both physically and mentally, can, in and of itself, trigger loss of control, which can feel like emotional eating. Find kind ways to comfort, nurture, distract, and resolve your issues. Anxiety, loneliness, boredom, and anger are emotions we all experience throughout life. Each has its own trigger, and each has its own appeasement. Food won’t fix any of these feelings. It may comfort for the short term, distract from the pain, or even numb you. But food won’t solve the problem. If anything, eating for an emotional hunger may only make you feel worse in the long run. You’ll ultimately have to deal with the source of the emotion.

8. Respect Your Body

Accept your genetic blueprint. Just as a person with a shoe size of eight would not expect to realistically squeeze into a size six, it is equally futile (and uncomfortable) to have a similar expectation about body size. But mostly, respect your body so you can feel better about who you are. It’s hard to reject the diet mentality if you are unrealistic and overly critical of your body size or shape. All bodies deserve dignity.

9. Movement—Feel the Difference

Forget militant exercise. Just get active and feel the difference. Shift your focus to how it feels to move your body, rather than the calorie-burning effect of exercise. If you focus on how you feel from working out, such as energized, it can make the difference between rolling out of bed for a brisk morning walk or hitting the snooze alarm.

10. Honor Your Health—Gentle Nutrition

Make food choices that honor your health and taste buds while making you feel good. Remember that you don’t have to eat perfectly to be healthy. You will not suddenly get a nutrient deficiency or become unhealthy, from one snack, one meal, or one day of eating. It’s what you eat consistently over time that matters. Progress, not perfection, is what counts. 

The only downfall of this way of laying this work out is that dieters come to this work looking for a solution but since they think like a dieter they can often turn the 10 principles into rules which results in not being an intuitive eater but instead following the “hunger fullness diet”. THIS is not food and body freedom, which is our ultimate goal for the people we work with.

What we do is build from there with a LOT of mindset work, nuance and action steps so that you can begin implementing this work and not just LEARNING more about it.

If you KNOW intuitive eating is right for you, you love the idea of food and body freedom and you have all the KNOWLEDGE, you just don’t know where to begin or you’re feeling stuck, you are not alone and this is what we want to help with in the new year!

To get the details first when our app is released on Feb 1 you do that at bit.ly/tblsappwaitlist 

We will be sending out ALL the details about this soon! (Think MAXIMUM support for minimum cost) our goal is to make this work accessible to every single person who wants it!

Hope you can make the best of this tough holiday season and we will see you on January 5th for our first episode of 2021! (We’ll be reposting a popular episode next week).

Welcome to how to love your body, on today’s episode we are talking about nutrition knowledge.

One thing people comment to us often is “shouldn’t people still know about nutrition though? Isn’t it important to know what’s in your food etc”? And in theory yes that would make sense.

But let’s look at how things are right now. As a dieter how much nutrition “information” do you have? Do you know a lot about food, what’s “healthy” and what is “best” to eat?

And how has that been for you?

Has it helped or just complicated things and made it so confusing?

If you think you need to teach a dieter or past dieter anything about nutrition you haven’t been a dieter. We know TOO MUCH!

We know about calories, macros, what’s healthy, best options, ingredients to avoid, ingredients to add….. And it’s brought us here. To a place where we can’t just eat, everything is a mathematical and nutritional equation.

A lack of nutrition information is not the problem. If KNOWING what were supposed to eat fixed things we wouldn’t all be here right now.

As an intuitive eater, the majority of the time, it is best to step away from the so-called nutrition knowledge and into your body’s knowing.

None of us need to be told it’s good to eat fruits, vegetables and a variety of foods from all the food groups. We KNOW THAT! What we do need is a complete transformation in how we think about food, how we relate to it, and how we use it.

Food is not just fuel, food isn’t medicine, food is something we need to live, it can be fuel and it can be nourishing but it’s also social, enjoyable and even emotional.

These are the aspects of nutrition, food and eating that we need to focus on when coming out of being a dieter, not more information.

Here are 3 things you can do in order to honor the nourishment of food while working on food mindset:

  • When you are working on allowing all foods, do just that allow ALL foods. Broaden your view of what this means. Many people just think of the foods they didn’t allow before but allowing all food can also include fruit, veg, and any other foods that feel “healthier” to you. You can also experiment in eating them in ways you didn’t allow yourself before, like with butter or on a dessert etc. Just begin exploring all foods, this is a great step in making food neutral, realizing there is a place for donuts and there's a place for salad and it’s all wonderful.

  • When people feel crappy on this journey (these phases are absolutely normal) the reaction is often - now I want to go back on a diet, this feels crappy right now. Get out of that all or nothing thinking and ask yourself, what can I add into my meals that would FEEL good? Don’t be afraid of nourishment now that you aren’t dieting, its not either diet and be perfect or eat donuts and pasta all day every day forever. You can have it all. AND you don’t need to know anything more about food other than variety is lovely so you can get a variety of nutrients.
  • Understand that your body doesn’t process food in 24 hr increments. Diet culture teaches us that each day needs to look a certain way and everyday needs to look the same.  Get x amount of fruit a day, x amount of calories or x amount of macros. THAT IS NOT HOW BODIES WORK. There isn’t a reset button that gets pushed at midnight. Think of nourishment on more of a weekly or even monthly basis. Get a wide variety of foods in overtime, it doesn’t all have to be today! Some days I eat very few fruit and veg and other days I’ll eat more and it’s all good!

These three things will allow you to be more flexible and easy going with your food while also getting variety and nutrients in! 

This is really just about trusting yourself and your body and knowing that there isn’t some magical combination of foods or way of eating that will make everything amazing. It’s just food. You got this. Your body knows so much more than you give it credit for. Listen in today and honor that amazing body of yours - including rest and doing things you enjoy!

Be sure to grab our free Separating Weight and Wellness Workbook, this will help a lot with finding flexibility in your eating and nutrition. You can grab it at bit.ly/wwworkbook

On today’s episode we are going to be talking about how to avoid the New Year, New You diet talk and not get sucked into the messages about losing the “quarantine weight for 2021” and all that BS.

People already have a lot of feels around 2020. It’s be a rough year. And yes, many people have already shared that it’s been even harder with food and body image because of quarantine, stay at home orders, etc - being totally out of your normal routine. When you aren’t used to being home all day it definitely can bring up a lot of food and body stuff. And even if you haven’t been home all day because you’ve been able to work as an essential business / reopening of businesses - food and body image are still a challenge of course! 

We want to shed some light on this topic because you better believe that diet culture and all people who have a business rooted in diet culture will be coming after everyone now that the new year is right around the corner. They will start to bring up pain points such as “the quarantine 15” as a tactic to drag people into their latest diet program. 

You know the drill (eye roll) - we’ve all been through many holiday seasons and new years and the marketing from diet culture starts to get absurd. And we’re over it. 

So how can you avoid the predictable messages that diet culture is going to start spewing at us. 

 

  1. We can’t stress this one enough - we say it often so you’ve most likely already done this but if you haven’t - time to clean up that social media / time to tighten it up and get rid of accounts that send you a message that doesn't align with you. Even if it’s friends who are sharing their own diet plans for the new year - unfollow and be done with it. If you scroll through your social media and you feel worse than when you started scrolling - let this be a sign to you that you have some clean up to do. Also, make sure you give yourself some time away from social media - we all can get caught scrolling through the bottomless pit where you swear you tell yourself you’re just going to look for a few minutes before bed and two hours later you're still wide eyed and mesmerized by the screen - we know we’re guilty of that! No matter how feel good/ positive you make your IG - being on it too much can have a negative effect too. Listen to your body. Ha, you knew we were going to say that! :)

  2. Predict the future! We know you may feel the slightest bit of temptation to diet - it looks so shiny - like it will solve all your problems if you just lose a little weight and you tell yourself after your quick little diet you promise you’ll go back to IE - We understand the desire - and you aren’t wrong for it - but seriously - we’ve always known until now that there’s no way to predict the future unless you’re talking about going on another diet - you can ABSOLUTELY predict what will happen if you go on another diet - even if it feels harmless and it won’t be too long - you even promise yourself that you’ll try not to restrict too much - you know whatever makes it sound like it will be different this time - but the thing is - no matter what - it won’t be different. A diet is a diet is a diet - and as we preach all the time - diets don’t work. SO - do a little prediction - write out what will happen if you did decide to go on a diet. Write out how you prepare for the diet that starts Monday - does it involve having a last supper? Most likely. Does it involve grocery shopping and stocking up on all the “clean” food that are “allowed” on this diet - most likely. And there won’t be any of your favorite desserts of snacks in that shopping cart - that’s for sure. You know the deal. It will last x amount of days before you feel miserable about it and you inevitably binge and you tell yourself you’ll start again on monday but before then you’ll just eat whatever. Does this sound familiar? It does to us! We did it too! So do your own future prediction and see if it’s worth it to go on another diet. This isn’t to shame you or tell you what to do - by all means you can go on a diet. We don’t recommend it but you can do whatever the heck you want!! But this will be a great reminder to you that you know exactly what will happen.

  3. Now that you’ve predicted the future regarding what will happen with the next diet you might feel tempted to try - NOW - let’s think of all the possibilities that could happen if you block out all the New Year diet messages and stick with Intuitive Eating and UnDieting -  This is a different approach for you possibly? You may be years into IE or this may be your first Holiday season in IE and either way that’s great - You’re here! Although it isn’t an easy prediction like dieting - Imagine what it would be like to work through food and body image challenges? Work though the mindset shifts? We already know a diet would bring us to a bad place fast - but what about UnDieting? What are the possibilities with UnDieting? What kind of relationship do you think could be possible with food? What about the relationship with your body? There is so much possibility! Things like freedom and peace around food and your body. A clear mind that doesn’t think about food all day. Being kind to your body. Feeling good in your body. We aren’t saying it’s easy but we are saying that sticking with UnDieting gives you a life that is free from diet culture. It allows you to be you without forcing yourself to fix something or look a certain way other than what you already look like. So, what possibilities can you think of that excite you? That gives you life? That makes you feel good?

  4. STOP IT - here’s a quick redirect - the second you see or hear any diet culture - literally say STOP IT outloud and redirect your brain, your eyes, your ears to something else. Don’t even allow that negativity into your life - say STOP IT and imagine a big stop sign or a brick wall or a protecting shield - or anything you come up with. When you hear STOP IT - what do you visualize? The first thing you thought of - go with that. STOP IT, visualize, and move on. If this is a person who is talking to you - it might come off as rude if you just scream STOP IT in their face lol but yell STOP IT in your head and visualize your sign and simply redirect the convo to something else. Don’t give any energy to it. If it continues - you can be firmer and say “I’m trying this thing, where I don’t talk about dieting or weight because I realized how much it was affecting me, so far it’s been so great.” 

There are so many things but really what you can do is protect yourself. Expect all the diet crap to come at your hard - get it out of sight as best you can. For the diet culture that does slip through the cracks - do your best to redirect it and move forward - and keep reminding yourself that you know what another diet with bring you (misery) -- but you can look forward to what UnDieting can/ will bring you if you keep doing the work. There is freedom in this work. There is no freedom in dieting. You deserve to give yourself all the possibilities of UnDieting 365 days and year and not let a holiday season tell you otherwise. 

In the new year we will be sharing the trailer for our documentary called Behind the Before and After  - to get it first, be invited to a private online pre screening of the film AND to enter to win 6 month of UnDieting support go to bit.ly/btbagiveaway

Welcome to how to love your body! Today’s episode is all about Noom, how it’s different, how it’s not and the trouble with pretty much everything they’re doing!

Note: You may notice our new podcast art! Don’t be alarmed it’s just us with a fun new cover by DrawnbyMary on Instagram!

This episode is brought to you by our 5 Day Mindset Boost Series that you can get at bit.ly/undietboost . This will help you work on releasing the dieting mindset which is a hugely important part of the UnDieting process.

Alright let’s Noom it up.

For those who don’t know what is Noom?

From my understanding it is a diet app created by psychologists - and it’s most defining feature is that it is psychology based.

It’s branding is very strong and people really see it as something totally different from other diets. I was at a networking event once and someone asked me what I do, I told them I was an intuitive eating counsellor and I help people stop dieting and have a healthier relationship with food. Their response was - oh like Noom??//??? Forehead slap.

As I did a bit more research for this episode Noom was actually created by 2 engineers, not psychologists. Yes perhaps they consult with psychologists but that’s not who created it. 

This app has 50 million users and to quote “The company aims to help reinforce positive decision-making to improve the lives and health of its users.”

Where does the psychology come in?

Let us take you through the journey on their website it says - find out what's possible with Noom’s psychology based evaluation and your 2 choices are Get fit for good and lose weight for good. (Yeah okay sure)

You then have to enter your weight and height (AKA BMI) - seeing the psychology yet? Yeah me neither.

It then asks ME what my ideal weight is (aka pick an arbitrary number ) - I deliberately picked a weight that is underweight for me to see what they’d say, the response was congratulations you set your first goal!

Then as I click through it says Noom creates long term results through habit and behavior change, not restrictive dieting… yeah okay, you know what behavior they want you to change? Eating food.

Then it says - 

Women in their 30s who want to reach an ideal weight between xxlb. and xx lb. (numbers that are too low for most grown women) especially tall women. Need a different strategy depending on their current lifestyle and then they ask me if i'm active have healthy habits (what the hell does that mean) 

Then As a Woman in your 30s, the specific combination of foods you eat can have a huge impact on your ability to burn fat. Which of the following best describes your typical lunch?

As I go through the quiz they say Sticking to a plan can be hard, but Noom makes it easy - how? Nobody knows - this is no different than any diet ever.

They claim I can lose 50 lbs in 6 months (and keep it off HAHA)

Then I answered a few more questions and they moved my 50 lb weight loss up by a month - what the hell

Oh wow answered a few more questions now I’m going to lose 50 lbs another 2 weeks sooner! 

Now we get to the first mention of psychology and it says they'll send me articles? And that there are no good or bad foods, just green and red foods - oh ef off!

Everyone falls off the wagon sometimes, we’ll help you get back on track

They claim to use cognitive behavioral therapy and they are asking a bunch of questions in order to help me “control my triggers” to eating.

And they use the TRUE findings that yo-yo dieting results in weight gain over time. 

This is so manipulative, if they mention it then THEY must be different but what’s different here?

From people we’ve talked to they almost always recommend 1100-1200 calories for everyone no matter what you answer to all these questions and it’s supposedly personalized.

The onboarding process seems so promising, it really does look and feel different than another diet but we need to see the wolf in sheep’s clothing here.

Then I have to pay before I can see any details (which I am not willing to do because there are a lot of stories out there about people trying to cancel with Noom and not being able to).

So what are the issues here:

  1. The worst part of Noom is their claim of being “psychology based” . THIS is the main issue we have with Noom. There are a million diets and diet apps out there like Noom that give you a set amount of calories, where you can track your food intake and workouts, that is nothing new, it’s the fact that they are tricking people into thinking this is something different that is the problem. Many people have asked us but what about Noom and unfortunately a TON of people have actually joined and got caught up in it just to realize its the same as any other diet. It preys on people trying to get out of the diet cycle but just lures them right back in.
  2. YOU choose the weight you want to be - there’s no mention of being underweight or suggestion that you don’t need to lose weight. This doesn’t have your best interests at heart, it’s just another million dollar company looking to make a dollar off your desire to lose weight to fit into what our culture says is the right way to have a body
  3.  THE ONLY part that is so called psychology is when they send some articles to read so it’s really just a diet with homework.

This will not give you any results that any other diet couldn’t give you. It’s restrictive, it’s unhealthy and it’s 100% focused on losing weight (even if you pick the get fit option and not the weight loss option they still make you enter a weight loss goal).

Steer clear of Noom and warn anyone who thinks that it’s different because of their psychology claims!

If you really do want to escape the diet cycle our 5 day UnDiet mindset boost series is available at bit.ly/undietboost

PS - Look out for The Body Love Society Intuitive Eating and Body Image Support App coming 2021 if you actually want to stop dieting and find food and body freedom (AND it’s more affordable than Noom too :) )

See you next week!

Welcome to How to Love Your Body - today we are talking about a concept that was created by Byron Katie - it’s all about questioning our thoughts and figuring out who we would be/ what would we feel like without the thoughts that cause us misery and suffering. This relates perfectly with our thoughts about food and our bodies.

 

It’s about questioning these thoughts and asking yourself if they are true. A big reason humans endure so much suffering in their thoughts is because they think things “should” be a certain way. It’s most likely because we were taught it should be this way or that the person next to you is doing something so you think to yourself that it should be this way for you too. This happens in all areas of our life - by this age I should have this and be this … I should look this way, I should eat this way, I should, should, should… it’s all a bunch of shoulding on yourself -- so how can you stop shoulding on yourself? 

 

Let’s dive into a few common thoughts that may hold you back from truly being able to live your life as an Intuitive Eating and UnDieter. 

1.Who would you be without the thought ...I need to lose weight? 

Is the answer peace/Freedom? If so you most likely aren’t suffering because you actually “need” to lose weight - you are suffering because of the THOUGHTS that you have. So what to do? Question these thoughts and shift them. 

 

Is it true you really need to lose weight? According to who? Is it that you need to lose weight or is it the pressure from society to meet certain standards to look a certain way? “I need to lose weight” has no depth - it is an empty “requirement” - how much weight do you need to lose? How can you actually put a number on it ? A lot of our “should” thoughts are completely random and we plucked them out of the air (or picked them up from what someone said) and decided they were true. 

 

The truth is we can’t control our bodies - we can’t decide that x amount of weight “will be the answer” - it’s not about pursuing weight loss. 

 

It’s about listening to your body and letting it do it’s thing. It’s about living a life without rigidity and obsession. It’s about doing things that feel good to you - your body will land where it’s gonna land regardless, it will ebb and flow throughout life - 

  1. Who would you be without the thought...I shouldn’t eat that?

 

Is the answer at ease with food? A person who can just eat what feels good and move on? If so you most likely aren’t suffering because you actually shouldn’t eat that - you are suffering because of the THOUGHTS that you have. So what to do? Question these thoughts and shift them. 

 

What if “eating that” is the very thing that is actually best for you and your body? What if eating that cookie will give you pleasure, joy, and a clear mind that isn’t filled with restriction. What if allowing yourself to eat what you want gives you a sense of empowerment which turns into listening to your body and finding a natural balance? what if you naturally eat a variety of foods with all different levels of nutrients that feel good to you? Without the thought “I shouldn't eat that” you can be free and at peace to trust your body and live your life.

  1. Who would you be without the thought...If I gain weight I’ll be unhealthy/ or if I don’t lose weight I’ll be unhealthy?

 

Is the answer at peace in your body? If so you most likely aren’t suffering because you actually will be unhealthy if you gain weight - you are suffering because of the THOUGHTS that you have. So what to do? Question these thoughts and shift them. 

 

What is healthy? What is unhealthy? Can you really be one or the other? When does one cross over and become healthy? When does one all of a sudden become unhealthy? There is not one way to define health - anyone can be on any part of the health spectrum at any size - and not one person is the same. What about the cases that you hear when someone obtains “perfect” health as in - always eats balanced/ in moderation, worksout daily, and is in a “normal” weight range - these people are not exempt from diseases or sickness. Someone living in a larger body can have great health - bloodwork is all in the normal range, heart health is on point, and no other diagnosis. So how in the world can someone say, If I gain weight I’ll be unhealthy - is that really true? There is scientific proof that this is not the truth. Anyone’s health can be anything - and we only have so much power (honestly very little in the scheme of things) over our health through our actions  - yes we can participate in positive health behaviors - that’s great. And even then we can’t control the outcome. 

 

We can let scary thoughts run our lives - control us in ways that feel suffocating - and such a healing thing to do for yourself is to learn to question these thoughts and realize - actually, THIS is the truth! 

 

So when these thoughts start to come up - ask yourself - who would I be without this thought? If you uncover a feeling of peace/ freedom/ or any other feeling that feels good - you can automatically uncover that it’s the thoughts that are causing all this uneasiness and stress. Not the actual thing you’re worrying about.

Thoughts are powerful and so are we - so it’s important to not believe every single thing we think and hear - and since thoughts are so powerful - shifting your thoughts to something that feels better will allow you to live a life that feels manageable, more enjoyable, and with less suffering. 

All this is easier said than done - but it can be done! 

Practice and see what comes from it. :) 

Reminder that you can get our Separating Weight and Wellness workbook. - get it here. bit.ly/wwworkbook

 

Welcome to How to Love Your Body - On today’s episode we are going to be talking about why balance isn’t the answer. It seems to be a common misconception you can stop dieting and just be balanced - what a healthy and sensible answer to our food issues! This actually is just another way to control.

When you think balance you may think - never eat too much or little. Instead of restricting the dessert, allow yourself to have a little. Eat but make sure you “watch what you eat.” It may not be extreme restriction because you are allowing but it still is all about limitation - and limitation - and forcing yourself into a perfectly balanced place will still cause bingeing. Obsession. And we can bet there isn’t that feeling of freedom around food. Trying to force yourself into balance isn’t food freedom - it’s dieting. Diet culture is getting sneakier -  they sell a “gentle” diet and call it balance.

If humans could just limit what they ate and find “balance” - that means diets would work - but scientifically we know diets don’t work. 

Pursuing balance is actually counterproductive. It is still a form of restriction - causing you to retaliate against the rules, keeping in that screw it attitude when you mess up.

We know - you may be saying, but I want to feel balanced with food. I want to be able to allow all food and give myself unconditional permission to eat and I also want to care about my health - I want to eat nutrient dense food I want to eat the rich pasta dish and the salad. I want to eat veggies with some of my meals and eat the dessert.. Isn’t that balance? How do I achieve this? 

Balance is a great place to land and that’s where we feel we live and many clients we have worked with have ended up.

NOTE: Balance is not something that is now perfectly in the middle. It’s not a forced place where you are never too full or never too hungry - it’s not the center. There’s an ebb and flow to balance in the UnDiet world - It’s a sway - on any given day you may eat more, you may eat less, you may eat anything in between. Balance is, yes, eating the pizza and the salad but it is also eating just the pizza on certain days because that’s what sounds the best to you and your body and then on other days it might be eating just the salad if that’s what feels the best to you - there is no diet mentality attached and all decisions are made from a place of how your body feels - certain days COULD look like “traditional balance” where you have some of everything without swaying too far from the middle but it could also look like swaying far to the left or right of the middle - that is IE / UnDieting and balance / that is how you live a sustainable life because there’s lots of room to sway.

But when you pursue balance, it’s forced, it’s fake, it’s a diet - it’s still rules, there’s still shoulds.

It seems counterintuitive but you need to forget about balance in order to naturally find balance. Meaning - if you are totally fine with eating as much chocolate as you want, anytime, any amount - there are no rules, shoulds or anything to retaliate against and your body has permission to find balance within that freedom, leaving you FREE and balanced. 

This doesn’t mean you always only have a couple bites but it means that it’s just a food that fits into your life with ease and flow.

True lifelong balance can only come with giving yourself complete freedom and go from there. And of course this won’t happen on day 1 but it does come. 

Here are some ways you can work on finding balance as an UnDieter.

-Spot all or nothing thinking around food - this is not about living in the world of extremes anymore. See where you can spot yourself thinking - I can have it all - OR - I can have nothing. I either have to be good OR bad. I have to restrict it all OR eat it all. There is no in between. Spotting this type of thinking is the first step to creating more balance in your life - awareness is how you can begin to shift the way you think about food and how you make choices about food. 

-Use the word AND - this is something that will allow you to “have it all” - you don’t have to opt for the “healthy” or “unhealthy” - if you really want 

- Instead of having the burger and fries or the green kale salad you can have the burger AND the salad

- ALLOWING any foods at all

-No judgement zone - Days are going to be different - the signals will be different - hunger will be different - and that is 100% acceptable - no matter what happens in a day - no judgement - it’s learning, it’s experimenting.

-Honor and expect the ebb and flow - Know that balance does not mean right smack dab in the center - KNOW and expect there will be an ebb and flow and know that is normal - and everyone’s ebb and flow will be different. Whatever your ebb and flow is what is. No forcing. No changing. No fixing - it’s right where it’s meant to be 

Let go of the idea of balance and let your body find it itself

This is the only way to have balance within a life of freedom

It’s not up to you and when you CHOOSE to be balanced, it comes with this work.

Just like your weight - we don’t get to choose and magically have the body size we want, our bodies find it’s happy place on it’s own.

Mindset of Allowing - being completely okay with eating and eating enough. Eating any kinds of food and then within that framework you can listen to your body.

This is a key requirement to balance (even though it seems like the opposite would be true)

You may have heard that we have a documentary coming out in early 2021 called Behind the Before and After - We’re super excited about this so we decided to have an online community prescreening so we can all watch it together and you can also be entered into a giveaway where you can get 6 months of free UnDiet Support. To get on the list - go to bit.ly/btbagiveaway

Before we go please Rate / Review our podcast to get the message out there. :)

See you next week! 

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